Sunday, July 25, 2010

The Refletion Difference

Ever wondered what was the real story behind the poem Jack and Jill...:)

Old Mrs. Higgins was happy today. She still remembered the day Mrs. Nell on her deathbed asked her to take care of her twin daughters. Finally her promise was going to be fulfilled partly today. It was Jillian’s wedding. The mansion looked beautiful. There were flowers all around. The food smelled great, the cake was the biggest the guests would have ever seen, the band played a beautiful mozartian tune and above all Jillian was marrying the guy she loved. She went upstairs to check on the progress of the bride’s dressing and upon entering saw Jackie kneeling down arranging the pleats of her sister’s dress.
They were uncannily alike. Beautiful, long flowing, silky hair, fair skin, brown doe eyes and petite body, though there temperaments were just the opposite. Jillian was the family girl, she loved to sew, cook, embroider and wanted a dozen kids, on the other hand Jackie was independent, and she loved playing outdoor games, was daring and hated cooking.
Jillian looked like a perfect bride and all Mrs. Higgins could do was hold her heart and give a sigh. Jackie looked very pretty too. She was going to be the prettiest maid of honour newyork had seen for a long long time.
Relieved that everything was going well, Mrs. Higgins left the room and went downstairs to check on the caterers.
The smile from jillian’s face vanished and Jackie left adjusting her dress and stood next to the wall.
Jackie knew that jill had an inklink of what she was upto. She was an independent soul and now when the war was going on with thousands of people getting killed and injured everyday, she had made up her mind that her country needed her more than her family and so she had enlisted her name for the duty of a nurse on the Red Cross. She had to leave today. Her bags were packed. She was here only for jillian’s wedding, the ship would leave in the evening.
Just the thought of leaving her sister scared her but the independent streak called her and with every passing minute the urge to go and serve her country increased.
Jill had read the letters Jackie had received from the Red Cross. She knew that she was leaving today but still could not understand that why was Jackie doing so. She knew she had to confront her before anything happened. She was scared. Part of her wanted to hold her sister tight and part of her just wanted to run away from the sad confrontations. Oh how she wished she could undo everything.
They both looked at each other, their eyes met and they knew the time had come; a decision had to be taken.
Jackie told Jillian it fit could wait till after the ceremony and heaved a breath of relief as she nodded.
The ceremony was beautiful. There was not an eye that didn’t shed a tear, every one ooed and aahed when the bride entered and as they read the vows everyone was touched by the depth of the words. Finally the minister announced them man and wife and the bride and groom kissed.
Jillian was tensed throughout the ceremony. Her eyes followed Jackie. She could sense the tremor in Jackie’s walk too. She knew now or never. She knew they had to go to the hill, there talking place since childhood. They could really bond on the hill. And so Jill gestured Jackie to follow her. Jackie initially confused, eventually understood.
They went up the hill, and Jill confronted Jackie.
Jill-“how could do this to me Jackie”
Jack-“this is a quest to find myself”
Jill-“how can you be so selfish, you have to be with me, your sister, you can’t abandon me and go away. What about your duty towards you sister”
Jack- “what about my duty towards my country Jill". It needs me. There are thousands of people dying. How can you call me selfish when it’s you who is acting so?”
Jill-“you are my sister. Do you know how will I survive without you?”
Jack-‘I can’t take it any more. I love you, you know that but this is something I need to do, for myself and my country. Please don’t force me Jill. I don’t have the strength nor the will to fight you.
Jill could feel the grief Jackie was feeling, her grief was equal.
Saying this Jackie ran down the hill. Her heart was breaking. She wanted to get to the house and get away as soon as possible. She was wearing the high heeled sandals from the wedding and she tripped, down she went the hill and hurt her head. There she sat holding her head in her hands when Jill reached the bottom and seeing Jackie in such a situation she rushed and hugged her for a long time. As they broke the embrace they knew no matter what ever happens, as many wars and distances come between them, their love for each other will never die. And then they laughed at how silly they had behaved throughout.
They returned back to the wedding with Mrs Higgins rushing to their side asking if both of them were okay and where had they disappeared to?
All they could do was smile and keep that adventure detail to themselves forever and cherish it for a long time till they meet again.
Finally Jill had made peace with her sister going away and Jackie was sure that no matter what happens she will always have her sister with her. She knew that she could leave in peace now. With this thought she left to gather her bags and set for the shore, she turned around and saw Jill watching her and could see the love sparkling in the form of tears in her eyes.

Friday, July 9, 2010


(Dedicated to a very dear friend who lost her mother at a very tender age. Am sorry I hurt you )

I emptied my heart in the night, the pillow was all wet and my eyes swollen, but my heart was full again in the morning, the heart wanted to vent out again, to lament, to cry out loud, proclaiming my love for you, announcing to the world that it was unfair to me, unfair of the world to take away something so beautiful from me. I somehow thought that if I shouted, the gods will hear me and send her back, send her soft hands, her beautiful curls and the most important her enveloping hugs back.
My harrowing sobs turned into sniffles, and I paused to breathe, I knew she was gone, long gone, and all I had was the empty vast feeling which gnawed at my heart. Oh how I wanted to feel her, and just wanted to smell her. Just wanted to tell her that I still remember your sweet scent ma. It reminds me of home no matter wherever I am. I just don’t want to forget it ever. It’s all I have left of you.
But why me, why me out of all people? I know am not the best person in the world, but am not the worst, am I? So why did you leave me, all alone in this world, am not even the grown up yet to fight the world and even if I were the grown up, I wanted your lap to be the kid for a while each day. How can you take away those childish moments away from me? Who gave you the right to do that to me?
I want to fight with you, complain till you agree to come back, I want to pull you, force you and just be the teenager I am and get you back no matter what. I know a lot of people suffer but I am not ready to lose you yet, I am not ready to forget that touch yet. Not that touch that comforted me in the nights, not that touch that held me when I was sick and not that touch that was so familiar that I would know it anywhere. Why does it feel lost? Why do my hands feel so empty? Why do I now stretch my hands in the darkness and nobody holds them, no body consoles me when I cry, no body shares my jokes the way you did ma.
No body.
My eyes welled up again, my throat constricted and those lamenting noises were back, I started to look around, for any reminder of you ran into your room, and looked for anything familiar, a fingerprint, a bangle, something you had cooked, your shoes, anything that will make me feel that you were still there and this all was just a dream, something that will convince me that I am just playing around and you are going to hear me and come running to console me.
Emptying my heart I slept, praying that the dream would end, but it was full again when I woke up.