Tuesday, February 7, 2012

Jumbled Sentiments



Lonely path,
I walk along,
It never leaves me
But am still forlorn
Droopy smiles,
Dried tears
Lost soul
Lost years
Unwanted thoughts
Thoughtless feelings
All dead ends
No new beginnings
Nails brittle
Teeth chatter
Cold around
Warmth doesn’t matter
Not sad
Just a normal day
Silence around
But so much to say
Mind matters
Niggling heart
Only one way to find
So many ways to part
Good bye I say
To life and death
Both are beautiful
Both are threats
How to end
I don't know
when to stop
when to go
Enough said
Enough done
Devoid of everything
i present my jumbled sentiments

Friday, June 3, 2011

Notions of an unemployed heart

Conflicted emotions surround my heart
My brain stops to think
My eyes sore red wondering all night
Did not sleep a wink
I want this; I want all of that,
The world of truth and lies,
Oh calm is not near me anymore,
The heart of mine like a baby cries
No sorrowful moans, nor tears of joy
It’s the lament of the confused
The worry of the path ahead
And sorrow for the life already used
The path so unclear, dull and lonely
Scares me to the core
I love him, I love him not
Oh yeah I am, I am a heart whore
For Two seconds I think of what I just said
And then smile to me aloud
Then the memory of each passing day
Does my memory cloud!
I scribble, I dabble, I scream, I babble
Life is just so wasted on nothing
They days goes by, the night comes out shy
Should I just start to sing?
Yeah I didn’t get a rhyming word
I know how you all think
I could have used a more suitable word
Instead of using sing for nothing
I look around; trust me not a sound,
Just tick tock of the clock
The moving fan looks down on me
Then laughs and then mock
I know I can do a lot
It’s the time to win the war
Then I laze and sleep and think aloud
But doomsday ain’t that far.
So why work and waste your time
When sleep is at your beck and call
Judge me all if you want to
In your court oh world is the ball!!

Tuesday, March 1, 2011

You and Me,NO future, Just History





In the oblivion which is your past life
I will fade away like old white
The skies will be blue,
The sun will still shine,
All will be d same
Except you won’t be mine
The cloudless skies will cry
The mourning widow will smile
When you will look back
And think for me a while
The eyes will be old,
The wrinkles added,
A few years down the line,
My memory faded
The beach walks,
The candles burnt
The nights in each other’s arms
Every second spent
The hurried kisses,
The tight embraces,
Stolen in the light
Hiding amongst the faces.
Everything wiped out
Will seem a dream
The darkness of the thought
Makes me scream
The rules don’t keep us together
To break them is not a choice
Lost in all this chaos,
I think I just lost my voice
With a life together not an option
I let it all go
May I be forgotten
If you want to
So Live me while you can
And let me live you
Till life leaves me
And love leaves you

Monday, January 31, 2011

Silent Fading



What the hell I wonder, the nail paint from my freshly manicured nails is already chipping off, darn that manicurist, she sure the hell didn’t know what she was doing. The bloody dark black bitch. After all it was worth a lot. I just don’t get a manicure every day you know. Yeah I am cynical, over bored and frustrated with life. Taking out faults with people, bitching about any random person to an invisible audience is what I am best at now days.

I am easily influenced as any one paying even a bit of attention to me makes me feel loved, wanted and everything that’s missing in my life. I use the F-work or hell I use the work fuck a lot and honestly don’t care the fuck about it. Well I am fat, no, not fat, fat are those pregnant ladies, I am a bit obese, not pretty anymore with those crow’s feet forming at my eyes and definitely not a sight for sore eyes, and you know what I really don’t care about that. I don’t care about those who don’t care about me. Hell I think I myself don’t care about me. I am not sixteen anymore and neither have that sexy-to-die-for-waist to fill up those fuckers’ imagination. I am just an old forty year old virgin. I know you must be thinking it’s the title of that stupid movie which finally had a happy ending, but trust me I know my life is no movie, I ain’t getting any oh-so-charming or even just any man to love me for not how I look or behave but for the inner beauty of mine. Ah! I don’t even think it exists anymore. With time everything wears off. Just about everything. Life I tell you.

It’s no bed of roses and for a woman who won’t sleep without any wooing with the male population she meets, well for her it surely isn’t. I don’t care now if I look good or not, I really don’t care if those pan stricken teeth are not leered at me anymore. I really don’t care if there is no groping of my assets in the crowded stations. Life somehow feels easy, you don’t expect anything from anyone and neither does anyone expect anything from you. Suits me just fine.

I know it won’t make a difference if I just disappear, it really won’t. It won’t hurt anyone if I go missing or die, just like the blood trickling down my wrist doesn’t hurt me. It doesn’t make much of a difference. I do feel a bit woozy but so what, just feels like the wine has gone to my head. My vision’s blurring, but it’s not like anyone will cry when I am gone. Ah! Fuck it; I am done living for no one so it’s better to just die for myself.

Silent Fading



What the hell I wonder, the nail paint from my freshly manicured nails is already chipping off, darn that manicurist, she sure the hell didn’t know what she was doing. The bloody dark black bitch. After all it was worth a lot. I just don’t get a manicure every day you know. Yeah I am cynical, over bored and frustrated with life. Taking out faults with people, bitching about any random person to an invisible audience is what I am best at now days.

I am easily influenced as any one paying even a bit of attention to me makes me feel loved, wanted and everything that’s missing in my life. I use the F-work or hell I use the work fuck a lot and honestly don’t care the fuck about it. Well I am fat, no, not fat, fat are those pregnant ladies, I am a bit obese, not pretty anymore with those crow’s feet forming at my eyes and definitely not a sight for sore eyes, and you know what I really don’t care about that. I don’t care about those who don’t care about me. Hell I think I myself don’t care about me. I am not sixteen anymore and neither have that sexy-to-die-for-waist to fill up those fuckers’ imagination. I am just an old forty year old virgin. I know you must be thinking it’s the title of that stupid movie which finally had a happy ending, but trust me I know my life is no movie, I ain’t getting any oh-so-charming or even just any man to love me for not how I look or behave but for the inner beauty of mine. Ah! I don’t even think it exists anymore. With time everything wears off. Just about everything. Life I tell you.

It’s no bed of roses and for a woman who won’t sleep without any wooing with the male population she meets, well for her it surely isn’t. I don’t care now if I look good or not, I really don’t care if those pan stricken teeth are not leered at me anymore. I really don’t care if there is no groping of my assets in the crowded stations. Life somehow feels easy, you don’t expect anything from anyone and neither does anyone expect anything from you. Suits me just fine.

I know it won’t make a different if I just disappear, it really won’t. It won’t hurt anyone if I go missing or die, just like the blood trickling down my wrist doesn’t hurt me. It doesn’t make much of a difference. I do feel a bit woozy but so what, just feels like the wine has gone to my head. My vision’s blurring, but it’s not like anyone will cry when I am gone. Ah! Fuck it; I am done living for no one so it’s better to just die for myself.

Monday, December 27, 2010

The Party Girl





Ting tong! Is it the party calling? Well be all ready to glam up the party girl because that cute boy you have a crush on, he is going to look at you only when you stand out. Worried on what to wear and how to look all gorgeous without looking slutty. Well I just might have the answers. So what are you waiting for, take notes now and be ready to knock everybody’s socks out? Be the glam queen at the party with everyone oohing and aahing as you snog the best guy around. Can you see smoke coming out of someone?


THE BEACHY SURPRISE - prepare well when there is water around. No granny panties allowed, because anytime the scene can change from the beach to the water. So remember to wear a nice swimsuit or better yet if you have the body to flaunt then a bikini under your clothes. Keep the clothes you wear for the beach party to the minimum, as in no extras like scarves or stoles needed. Keep the jewellery chunky and yet don’t overdo yourself. Wearing shell s to the beach is a thing of the past and surely too predictable so leave them behind. For the feet stick to cute flats, or better yet pretty flip flops will make it better. The way to stand out is to wear some flowers or may be some earthy beads and look fabulous.



HOUSE PARTY- do you have a pair of dungarees lying at the back of your closet. Please do dig them out and try them on, cuz its time to throw a party in your house. Want to glam it up a bit then don a beautiful yet casual looking cotton sundress. To go for something different ,harems with a cute racer back will do the trick too. After all it’s a house party, you don’t want to wear clothes too tight and then spend all the time tugging them around. Right! Don’t overdo the jewellery. Stick to one accessory only. Go dance to the tunes and have fun girl.


PYJAMA PARTY- yeah I know, it is a house party, but sans boys and this is one place where you can show the girls that the pyjama party or the soirĂ©e as the new gossip girl term for it is, is the one place where you can be the crazy pink girl. Go buy yourself a beautiful looking pyjama with hearts or may be something sexy like a night gown that shows your curves well. Now wear those bunny foam slippers and a head band with a lot of lace sewn on it and there you are ‘the pink girl’. Fabulous and so girly. Don’t forget the pink nail paint too. To complete the look girl.


LOUNGE- this is the place where you take out the best dress you have, pair it up with your highest heels and take out the best jewellery. Oh yeah don’t forget your best make up too. The lounge is the best place to look the best with no reason for the whole arrangement to get spoiled. You don’t dance enough for your make up to get spoilt; you don’t walk enough for your ankles to kill you because of the heels. All you do is sit pretty and talk pretty. Go for shiny and metallic finish dresses or better yet go for a nice strapless chiffon gown and dazzle them all.



CLUBBING TIME- this is the best time of all. Time to look great and forget about it. Remember to stick to wedges or block heels if you want your ankles safe by the morning. But the glam girl has to wear peep toes with stiletto heels. Stick to satin or lycra this clubbing season. Body hugging is back with roses or zippers or even may be shorts. The one thing that’s ruling the roost is the boot heels. Wear long chains in metallic colours around your neck to finish up the glam yet chic look.


Go and let your hair down and forget that there is a tomorrow girls. Have fun shaking your glam clad booty on the dance floor. Do remember I will be there keeping an eye.

Monday, December 20, 2010

The life I left behind..


"All the world's a stage,
And all the men and women merely players:
They have their exits and their entrances;
And one man in his time plays many parts"

Shakespeare said that...let’s see how it applies in the normal college life...

A normal day in the normal college, national institute of fashion technology. I am in the class, as usual not paying attention and lost in my own world of thoughts and words in a corner scribbling away to glory and half heartedly listening to what our guest faculty has to say.
One of the four air conditioners is working. Someone is playing with her pen, the tic-tac echoing around. There are people playing with their hair, some reading a book, a murmur of silence surrounds the whole classroom.
The backbenchers are as usual sitting behind. Discussing some things (I leave the topic of discussion for the readers to guess, but mind it, it was nowhere near boring). A giggle here, a giggle there, fills the whole back of the classroom.
The geeks a.k.a speckyees (now replaced by lenses) are sitting in front glued to every word he utters, noting down every syllable, every sigh, every a, an ,the, mentioned. The sleepers of the class a.k.a getting –bored-not-interested- are yawning and already half asleep, fighting to keep their eyes open and half of them perched on their neighbour’s shoulders. Suddenly they slip down the shoulder and realise that they are ain class and thus the lost fight to not sleep begins again.
Then there are the second or the third benchers, mediocre writing at times and at times looking bored, basically they are just confused wondering whether to be the geek or the outrageous back bencher. These are also known as the average normal kids. Then there are the male starved females (couldn’t find a better term) , who for today are next to the front benchers, batting their eyelashes , a half smile on their faces, pretending to be glued to every word said, lips tucked behind their teeth , they kind of swooning , as if every word he’s saying is the elixir of life.
Then the usual wannabees, fashionistas, jocks, nerds, all who need no introduction. Then the lovers without whom every class is incomplete. Who may be not sitting very close, are exchanging glances and smiles whose meaning only they know. Exchanging whispers, stares and smiles, oblivious to anything happening, around, just existing for each other. As cheesy as it sounds. It’s completely true.
A joke suddenly cracked bonding the whole class, while it lasts, every one listening to the same thing for a while, forgetting their roles in the class and being just a simple student for once. Well that it.
A subtotal of everyone present.
And then last but not the least “me”. What am I? In which category do I fall into? What am I doing here not concentrating on the lecture and observing the around and writing. Well you could say just a simple crazy foolish intelligent WORDISTA...